as you like it by william shakespeare living in exile his brother and usurper of his dominions lord attending on the banished duke a courtier attending upon frederick wrestler to frederick son of sir rowland de boys servant to oliver the court jester a vicar shepherd a country fellow in love with audrey person representing daughter to the banished duke daughter to frederick a shepherdes a country wench lords pages foresters and attendants house court and the forest of arden orchard of house enter and as remember adam it was upon this fashion bequeathed me by will but poor a thousand crowns and as thou say'st charged my brother on his blessing to breed me well and there begins my sadness my brother jaques he keeps at school and report speaks goldenly of his profit for my part he keeps me rustically at home or to speak more properly stays me here at home unkept for call you that keeping for a gentleman of my birth that differs not from the stalling of an ox his horses are bred better for besides that they are fair with their feeding they are taught their manage and to that end riders dearly hir'd but his brother gain nothing under him but growth for the which his animals on his dunghills are as much bound to him as besides this nothing that he so plentifully gives me the something that nature gave me his countenance seems to take from me he lets me feed with his hinds bars me the place of a brother and as much as in him lies mines my gentility with my education this is it adam that grieves me and the spirit of my father which think is within me begins to mutiny against this servitude will no longer endure it though yet know no wise remedy how to avoid it enter yonder comes my master your brother go apart adam and thou shalt hear how he will shake me up retires now sir what make you here nothing am not taught to make any thing what mar you then sir marry sir am helping you to mar that which god made a poor unworthy brother of yours with idleness marry sir be better employed and be nought awhile shall keep your hogs and eat husks with them what prodigal portion have spent that should come to such penury know you where you are sir sir very well here in your orchard know you before whom sir ay better than him am before knows me know you are my eldest brother and in the gentle condition of blood you should so know me the courtesy of nations allows you my better in that you are the firstborn but the same tradition takes not away my blood were there twenty brothers betwixt us have as much of my father in me as you albeit confess your coming before me is nearer to his reverence what boy strikes him come come elder brother you are too young in this wilt thou lay hands on me villain am no villain am the youngest son of sir rowland de boys he was my father and he is thrice a villain that says such a father begot villains wert thou not my brother would not take this hand from thy throat till this other had pull'd out thy tongue for saying so thou has rail'd on thyself coming forward sweet masters be patient for your father's remembrance be at accord let me go say will not till please you shall hear me my father charg'd you in his will to give me good education you have train'd me like a peasant obscuring and hiding from me all gentlemanlike qualities the spirit of my father grows strong in me and will no longer endure it therefore allow me such exercises as may become a gentleman or give me the poor allottery my father left me by testament with that will go buy my fortunes and what wilt thou do beg when that is spent well sir get you in will not long be troubled with you you shall have some part of your will pray you leave me no further offend you than becomes me for my good get you with him you old dog is 'old dog my reward most true have lost my teeth in your service god be with my old master he would not have spoke such a word exeunt and is it even so begin you to grow upon me will physic your rankness and yet give no thousand crowns neither holla dennis enter calls your worship not charles the duke's wrestler here to speak with me so please you he is here at the door and importunes access to you call him in exit 'twill be a good way and tomorrow the wrestling is enter good morrow to your worship good monsieur charles what's the new news at the new court there's no news at the court sir but the old news that is the old duke is banished by his younger brother the new duke and three or four loving lords have put themselves into voluntary exile with him whose lands and revenues enrich the new duke therefore he gives them good leave to wander can you tell if rosalind the duke's daughter be banished with her father no for the duke's daughter her cousin so loves her being ever from their cradles bred together that she would have followed her exile or have died to stay behind her she is at the court and no less beloved of her uncle than his own daughter and never two ladies loved as they do where will the old duke live they say he is already in the forest of arden and a many merry men with him and there they live like the old robin hood of england they say many young gentlemen flock to him every day and fleet the time carelessly as they did in the golden world what you wrestle tomorrow before the new duke marry do sir and came to acquaint you with a matter am given sir secretly to understand that your younger brother orlando hath a disposition to come in disguis'd against me to try a fall tomorrow sir wrestle for my credit and he that escapes me without some broken limb shall acquit him well your brother is but young and tender and for your love would be loath to foil him as must for my own honour if he come in therefore out of my love to you came hither to acquaint you withal that either you might stay him from his intendment or brook such disgrace well as he shall run into in that it is thing of his own search and altogether against my will charles thank thee for thy love to me which thou shalt find will most kindly requite had myself notice of my brother's purpose herein and have by underhand means laboured to dissuade him from it but he is resolute i'll tell thee charles it is the stubbornest young fellow of france full of ambition an envious emulator of every man's good parts a secret and villainous contriver against me his natural brother therefore use thy discretion had as lief thou didst break his neck as his finger and thou wert best look to't for if thou dost him any slight disgrace or if he do not mightily grace himself on thee he will practise against thee by poison entrap thee by some treacherous device and never leave thee till he hath ta'en thy life by some indirect means or other for assure thee and almost with tears speak it there is not one so young and so villainous this day living speak but brotherly of him but should anatomize him to thee as he is must blush and weep and thou must look pale and wonder am heartily glad came hither to you if he come tomorrow i'll give him his payment if ever he go alone again i'll never wrestle for prize more and so god keep your worship exit farewell good charles now will stir this gamester hope shall see an end of him for my soul yet know not why hates nothing more than he yet he's gentle never school'd and yet learned full of noble device of all sorts enchantingly beloved and indeed so much in the heart of the world and especially of my own people who best know him that am altogether misprised but it shall not be so long this wrestler shall clear all nothing remains but that kindle the boy thither which now i'll go about exit lawn before the palace enter and pray thee rosalind sweet my coz be merry dear celia show more mirth than am mistress of and would you yet were merrier unless you could teach me to forget a banished father you must not learn me how to remember any extraordinary pleasure herein see thou lov'st me not with the full weight that love thee if my uncle thy banished father had banished thy uncle the duke my father so thou hadst been still with me could have taught my love to take thy father for mine so wouldst thou if the truth of thy love to me were so righteously temper'd as mine is to thee well will forget the condition of my estate to rejoice in yours you know my father hath no child but nor none is like to have and truly when he dies thou shalt be his heir for what he hath taken away from thy father perforce will render thee again in affection by mine honour will and when break that oath let me turn monster therefore my sweet rose my dear rose be merry from henceforth will coz and devise sports let me see what think you of falling in love marry prithee do to make sport withal but love no man in good earnest nor no further in sport neither than with safety of a pure blush thou mayst in honour come off again what shall be our sport then let us sit and mock the good housewife fortune from her wheel that her gifts may henceforth be bestowed equally would we could do so for her benefits are mightily misplaced and the bountiful blind woman doth most mistake in her gifts to women 'tis true for those that she makes fair she scarce makes honest and those that she makes honest she makes very illfavouredly nay now thou goest from fortune's office to nature's fortune reigns in gifts of the world not in the lineaments of nature enter no when nature hath made a fair creature may she not by fortune fall into the fire though nature hath given us wit to flout at fortune hath not fortune sent in this fool to cut off the argument indeed there is fortune too hard for nature when fortune makes nature's natural the cutteroff of nature's wit peradventure this is not fortune's work neither but nature's who perceiveth our natural wits too dull to reason of such goddesses and hath sent this natural for our whetstone for always the dullness of the fool is the whetstone of the wits how now wit whither wander you mistress you must come away to your father were you made the messenger no by mine honour but was bid to come for you where learned you that oath fool of a certain knight that swore by his honour they were good pancakes and swore by his honour the mustard was naught now i'll stand to it the pancakes were naught and the mustard was good and yet was not the knight forsworn how prove you that in the great heap of your knowledge ay marry now unmuzzle your wisdom stand you both forth now stroke your chins and swear by your beards that am a knave by our beards if we had them thou art by my knavery if had it then were but if you swear by that that not you are not forsworn no more was this knight swearing by his honour for he never had any or if he had he had sworn it away before ever he saw those pancackes or that mustard prithee who is't that thou mean'st one that old frederick your father loves my father's love is enough to honour him enough speak no more of him you'll be whipt for taxation one of these days the more pity that fools may not speak wisely what wise men do foolishly by my troth thou sayest true for since the little wit that fools have was silenced the little foolery that wise men have makes a great show here comes monsieur le beau enter with his mouth full of news which he will put on us as pigeons feed their young then shall we be newscramm'd all the better we shall be the more marketable bon jour monsieur le beau what's the news fair princess you have lost much good sport sport of what colour what colour madam how shall answer you as wit and fortune will or as the destinies decrees well said that was laid on with a trowel nay if keep not my rank thou losest thy old smell you amaze me ladies would have told you of good wrestling which you have lost the sight of yet tell us the manner of the wrestling will tell you the beginning and if it please your ladyships you may see the end for the best is yet to do and here where you are they are coming to perform it well the beginning that is dead and buried there comes an old man and his three sons could match this beginning with an old tale three proper young men of excellent growth and presence with bills on their necks 'be it known unto all men by these presents the eldest of the three wrestled with charles the duke's wrestler which charles in a moment threw him and broke three of his ribs that there is little hope of life in him so he serv'd the second and so the third yonder they lie the poor old man their father making such pitiful dole over them that all the beholders take his part with weeping alas but what is the sport monsieur that the ladies have lost why this that speak of thus men may grow wiser every day it is the first time that ever heard breaking of ribs was sport for ladies or promise thee but is there any else longs to see this broken music in his sides is there yet another dotes upon ribbreaking shall we see this wrestling cousin you must if you stay here for here is the place appointed for the wrestling and they are ready to perform it yonder sure they are coming let us now stay and see it flourish enter and come on since the youth will not be entreated his own peril on his forwardness is yonder the man even he madam alas he is too young yet he looks successfully how now daughter and cousin are you crept hither to see the wrestling ay my liege so please you give us leave you will take little delight in it can tell you there is such odds in the man in pity of the challenger's youth would fain dissuade him but he will not be entreated speak to him ladies see if you can move him call him hither good monsieur le beau do so i'll not be by goes apart monsieur the challenger the princess calls for you attend them with all respect and duty young man have you challeng'd charles the wrestler no fair princess he is the general challenger come but in as others do to try with him the strength of my youth young gentleman your spirits are too bold for your years you have seen cruel proof of this man's strength if you saw yourself with your eyes or knew yourself with your judgment the fear of your adventure would counsel you to a more equal enterprise we pray you for your own sake to embrace your own safety and give over this attempt do young sir your reputation shall not therefore be misprised we will make it our suit to the duke that the wrestling might not go forward beseech you punish me not with your hard thoughts wherein confess me much guilty to deny so fair and excellent ladies any thing but let your fair eyes and gentle wishes go with me to my trial wherein if be foil'd there is but one sham'd that was never gracious if kill'd but one dead that is willing to be so shall do my friends no wrong for have none to lament me the world no injury for in it have nothing only in the world fill up a place which may be better supplied when have made it empty the little strength that have would it were with you and mine to eke out hers fare you well pray heaven be deceiv'd in you your heart's desires be with you come where is this young gallant that is so desirous to lie with his mother earth ready sir but his will hath in it a more modest working you shall try but one fall no warrant your grace you shall not entreat him to a second that have so mightily persuaded him from a first you mean to mock me after you should not have mock'd me before but come your ways now hercules be thy speed young man would were invisible to catch the strong fellow by the leg they wrestle excellent young man if had a thunderbolt in mine eye can tell who should down is thrown shout no more no more yes beseech your grace am not yet well breath'd how dost thou charles he cannot speak my lord bear him away what is thy name young man orlando my liege the youngest son of sir rowland de boys would thou hadst been son to some man else the world esteem'd thy father honourable but did find him still mine enemy thou shouldst have better pleas'd me with this deed hadst thou descended from another house but fare thee well thou art a gallant youth would thou hadst told me of another father exeunt train and were my father coz would do this am more proud to be sir rowland's son his youngest son and would not change that calling to be adopted heir to frederick my father lov'd sir rowland as his soul and all the world was of my father's mind had before known this young man his son should have given him tears unto entreaties ere he should thus have ventur'd gentle cousin let us go thank him and encourage him my father's rough and envious disposition sticks me at heart sir you have well deserv'd if you do keep your promises in love but justly as you have exceeded all promise your mistress shall be happy gentleman giving him a chain from her neck wear this for me one out of suits with fortune that could give more but that her hand lacks means shall we go coz ay fare you well fair gentleman can not say thank you my better parts are all thrown down and that which here stands up is but a quintain a mere lifeless block he calls us back my pride fell with my fortunes i'll ask him what he would did you call sir sir you have wrestled well and overthrown more than your enemies will you go coz have with you fare you well exeunt and what passion hangs these weights upon my tongue cannot speak to her yet she urg'd conference poor orlando thou art overthrown or charles or something weaker masters thee reenter good sir do in friendship counsel you to leave this place albeit you have deserv'd high commendation true applause and love yet such is now the duke's condition that he misconstrues all that you have done the duke is humorous what he is indeed more suits you to conceive than to speak of thank you sir and pray you tell me this which of the two was daughter of the duke that here was at the wrestling neither his daughter if we judge by manners but yet indeed the smaller is his daughter the other is daughter to the banish'd duke and here detain'd by her usurping uncle to keep his daughter company whose loves are dearer than the natural bond of sisters but can tell you that of late this duke hath ta'en displeasure 'gainst his gentle niece grounded upon no other argument but that the people praise her for her virtues and pity her for her good father's sake and on my life his malice 'gainst the lady will suddenly break forth sir fare you well hereafter in a better world than this shall desire more love and knowledge of you rest much bounden to you fare you well exit thus must from the smoke into the smother from tyrant duke unto a tyrant brother but heavenly rosalind exit the duke's palace enter and why cousin why rosalind cupid have mercy not a word not one to throw at a dog no thy words are too precious to be cast away upon curs throw some of them at me come lame me with reasons then there were two cousins laid up when the one should be lam'd with reasons and the other mad without any but is all this for your father no some of it is for my child's father how full of briers is this workingday world they are but burs cousin thrown upon thee in holiday foolery if we walk not in the trodden paths our very petticoats will catch them could shake them off my coat these burs are in my heart hem them away would try if could cry 'hem and have him come come wrestle with thy affections they take the part of a better wrestler than myself a good wish upon you you will try in time in despite of a fall but turning these jests out of service let us talk in good earnest is it possible on such a sudden you should fall into so strong a liking with old sir rowland's youngest son the duke my father lov'd his father dearly doth it therefore ensue that you should love his son dearly by this kind of chase should hate him for my father hated his father dearly yet hate not orlando no faith hate him not for my sake why should not doth he not deserve well enter with let me love him for that and do you love him because do look here comes the duke with his eyes full of anger mistress dispatch you with your safest haste and get you from our court me uncle you cousin within these ten days if that thou beest found so near our public court as twenty miles thou diest for it do beseech your grace let me the knowledge of my fault bear with me if with myself hold intelligence or have acquaintance with mine own desires if that do not dream or be not frantic as do trust am not then dear uncle never so much as in a thought unborn did offend your highness thus do all traitors if their purgation did consist in words they are as innocent as grace itself let it suffice thee that trust thee not yet your mistrust cannot make me a traitor tell me whereon the likelihood depends thou art thy father's daughter there's enough was when your highness took his dukedom so was when your highness banish'd him treason is not inherited my lord or if we did derive it from our friends what's that to me my father was no traitor then good my liege mistake me not so much to think my poverty is treacherous dear sovereign hear me speak ay celia we stay'd her for your sake else had she with her father rang'd along did not then entreat to have her stay it was your pleasure and your own remorse was too young that time to value her but now know her if she be a traitor why so am we still have slept together rose at an instant learn'd play'd eat together and wheresoe'er we went like juno's swans still we went coupled and inseparable she is too subtle for thee and her smoothness her very silence and her patience speak to the people and they pity her thou art a fool she robs thee of thy name and thou wilt show more bright and seem more virtuous when she is gone then open not thy lips firm and irrevocable is my doom which have pass'd upon her she is banish'd pronounce that sentence then on me my liege cannot live out of her company you are a fool you niece provide yourself if you outstay the time upon mine honour and in the greatness of my word you die exeunt and my poor rosalind whither wilt thou go wilt thou change fathers will give thee mine charge thee be not thou more griev'd than am have more cause thou hast not cousin prithee be cheerful know'st thou not the duke hath banish'd me his daughter that he hath not no hath not rosalind lacks then the love which teacheth thee that thou and am one shall we be sund'red shall we part sweet girl no let my father seek another heir therefore devise with me how we may fly whither to go and what to bear with us and do not seek to take your charge upon you to bear your griefs yourself and leave me out for by this heaven now at our sorrows pale say what thou canst i'll go along with thee why whither shall we go to seek my uncle in the forest of arden alas what danger will it be to us maids as we are to travel forth so far beauty provoketh thieves sooner than gold i'll put myself in poor and mean attire and with a kind of umber smirch my face the like do you so shall we pass along and never stir assailants were it not better because that am more than common tall that did suit me all points like a man gallant curtleaxe upon my thigh boar spear in my hand and in my heart lie there what hidden woman's fear there will we'll have a swashing and a martial outside as many other mannish cowards have that do outface it with their semblances what shall call thee when thou art a man i'll have no worse a name than jove's own page and therefore look you call me ganymede but what will you be call'd something that hath a reference to my state no longer celia but aliena but cousin what if we assay'd to steal the clownish fool out of your father's court would he not be a comfort to our travel he'll go along o'er the wide world with me leave me alone to woo him let's away and get our jewels and our wealth together devise the fittest time and safest way to hide us from pursuit that will be made after my flight now go we in content to liberty and not to banishment exeunt the forest of arden enter and two or three like foresters now my comates and brothers in exile hath not old custom made this life more sweet than that of painted pomp are not these woods more free from peril than the envious court here feel we not the penalty of adam the seasons difference as the icy fang and churlish chiding of the winter's wind which when it bites and blows upon my body even till shrink with cold smile and say 'this is no flattery these are counsellors that feelingly persuade me what am sweet are the uses of adversity which like the toad ugly and venomous wears yet a precious jewel in his head and this our life exempt from public haunt finds tongues in trees books in the running brooks sermons in stones and good in everything would not change it happy is your grace that can translate the stubbornness of fortune into so quiet and so sweet a style come shall we go and kill us venison and yet it irks me the poor dappled fools being native burghers of this desert city should in their own confines with forked heads have their round haunches gor'd indeed my lord the melancholy jaques grieves at that and in that kind swears you do more usurp than doth your brother that hath banish'd you today my lord of amiens and myself did steal behind him as he lay along under an oak whose antique root peeps out upon the brook that brawls along this wood to the which place a poor sequest'red stag that from the hunter's aim had ta'en a hurt did come to languish and indeed my lord the wretched animal heav'd forth such groans that their discharge did stretch his leathern coat almost to bursting and the big round tears cours'd one another down his innocent nose in piteous chase and thus the hairy fool much marked of the melancholy jaques stood on th extremest verge of the swift brook augmenting it with tears but what said jaques did he not moralize this spectacle yes into a thousand similes first for his weeping into the needless stream 'poor deer quoth he 'thou mak'st a testament as worldlings do giving thy sum of more to that which had too much then being there alone left and abandoned of his velvet friends ''tis right quoth he 'thus misery doth part the flux of company anon a careless herd full of the pasture jumps along by him and never stays to greet him 'ay quoth jaques 'sweep on you fat and greasy citizens 'tis just the fashion wherefore do you look upon that poor and broken bankrupt there thus most invectively he pierceth through the body of the country city court yea and of this our life swearing that we are mere usurpers tyrants and what's worse to fright the animals and to kill them up in their assign'd and native dwellingplace and did you leave him in this contemplation we did my lord weeping and commenting upon the sobbing deer show me the place love to cope him in these sullen fits for then he's full of matter i'll bring you to him straight exeunt the palace enter with can it be possible that no man saw them it cannot be some villains of my court are of consent and sufferance in this cannot hear of any that did see her the ladies her attendants of her chamber saw her abed and in the morning early they found the bed untreasur'd of their mistress my lord the roynish clown at whom so oft your grace was wont to laugh is also missing hisperia the princess gentlewoman confesses that she secretly o'erheard your daughter and her cousin much commend the parts and graces of the wrestler that did but lately foil the sinewy charles and she believes wherever they are gone that youth is surely in their company send to his brother fetch that gallant hither if he be absent bring his brother to me i'll make him find him do this suddenly and let not search and inquisition quail to bring again these foolish runaways exeunt before house enter and meeting who's there what my young master my gentle master my sweet master you memory of old sir rowland why what make you here why are you virtuous why do people love you and wherefore are you gentle strong and valiant why would you be so fond to overcome the bonny prizer of the humorous duke your praise is come too swiftly home before you know you not master to some kind of men their graces serve them but as enemies no more do yours your virtues gentle master are sanctified and holy traitors to you what a world is this when what is comely envenoms him that bears it why what's the matter unhappy youth come not within these doors within this roof the enemy of all your graces lives your brother no no brother yet the son yet not the son will not call him son of him was about to call his father hath heard your praises and this night he means to burn the lodging where you use to lie and you within it if he fail of that he will have other means to cut you off overheard him and his practices this is no place this house is but a butchery abhor it fear it do not enter it why whither adam wouldst thou have me go no matter whither so you come not here what wouldst thou have me go and beg my food or with a base and boist'rous sword enforce thievish living on the common road this must do or know not what to do yet this will not do do how can rather will subject me to the malice of a diverted blood and bloody brother but do not so have five hundred crowns the thrifty hire sav'd under your father which did store to be my fosternurse when service should in my old limbs lie lame and unregarded age in corners thrown take that and he that doth the ravens feed yea providently caters for the sparrow be comfort to my age here is the gold all this give you let me be your servant though look old yet am strong and lusty for in my youth never did apply hot and rebellious liquors in my blood nor did not with unbashful forehead woo the means of weakness and debility therefore my age is as a lusty winter frosty but kindly let me go with you i'll do the service of a younger man in all your business and necessities good old man how well in thee appears the constant service of the antique world when service sweat for duty not for meed thou art not for the fashion of these times where none will sweat but for promotion and having that do choke their service up even with the having it is not so with thee but poor old man thou prun'st a rotten tree that cannot so much as a blossom yield in lieu of all thy pains and husbandry but come thy ways we'll go along together and ere we have thy youthful wages spent we'll light upon some settled low content master go on and will follow the to the last gasp with truth and loyalty from seventeen years till now almost fourscore here lived but now live here no more at seventeen years many their fortunes seek but at fourscore it is too late a week yet fortune cannot recompense me better than to die well and not my master's debtor exeunt the forest of arden enter for for and alias jupiter how weary are my spirits care not for my spirits if my legs were not weary could find in my heart to disgrace my man's apparel and to cry like a woman but must comfort the weaker vessel as doublet and hose ought to show itself courageous to petticoat therefore courage good aliena pray you bear with me cannot go no further for my part had rather bear with you than bear you yet should bear no cross if did bear you for think you have no money in your purse well this is the forest of arden ay now am in arden the more fool when was at home was in a better place but travellers must be content enter and ay be so good touchstone look you who comes here a young man and an old in solemn talk that is the way to make her scorn you still corin that thou knew'st how do love her partly guess for have lov'd ere now no corin being old thou canst not guess though in thy youth thou wast as true a lover as ever sigh'd upon a midnight pillow but if thy love were ever like to mine as sure think did never man love so how many actions most ridiculous hast thou been drawn to by thy fantasy into a thousand that have forgotten thou didst then never love so heartily if thou rememb'rest not the slightest folly that ever love did make thee run into thou hast not lov'd or if thou hast not sat as do now wearing thy hearer in thy mistress praise thou hast not lov'd or if thou hast not broke from company abruptly as my passion now makes me thou hast not lov'd phebe phebe phebe exit silvius alas poor shepherd searching of thy wound have by hard adventure found mine own and mine remember when was in love broke my sword upon a stone and bid him take that for coming anight to jane smile and remember the kissing of her batler and the cow's dugs that her pretty chopt hands had milk'd and remember the wooing of peascod instead of her from whom took two cods and giving her them again said with weeping tears 'wear these for my sake we that are true lovers run into strange capers but as all is mortal in nature so is all nature in love mortal in folly thou speak'st wiser than thou art ware of nay shall ne'er be ware of mine own wit till break my shins against it jove jove this shepherd's passion is much upon my fashion and mine but it grows something stale with me pray you one of you question yond man if he for gold will give us any food faint almost to death holla you clown peace fool he's not thy ensman who calls your betters sir else are they very wretched peace say good even to you friend and to you gentle sir and to you all prithee shepherd if that love or gold can in this desert place buy entertainment bring us where we may rest ourselves and feed here's a young maid with travel much oppress'd and faints for succour fair sir pity her and wish for her sake more than for mine own my fortunes were more able to relieve her but am shepherd to another man and do not shear the fleeces that graze my master is of churlish disposition and little recks to find the way to heaven by doing deeds of hospitality besides his cote his flocks and bounds of feed are now on sale and at our sheepcote now by reason of his absence there is nothing that you will feed on but what is come see and in my voice most welcome shall you be what is he that shall buy his flock and pasture that young swain that you saw here but erewhile that little cares for buying any thing pray thee if it stand with honesty buy thou the cottage pasture and the flock and thou shalt have to pay for it of us and we will mend thy wages like this place and willingly could waste my time in it assuredly the thing is to be sold go with me if you like upon report the soil the profit and this kind of life will your very faithful feeder be and buy it with your gold right suddenly exeunt another part of the forest enter and under the greenwood tree who loves to lie with me and turn his merry note unto the sweet bird's throat come hither come hither come hither here shall he see no enemy but winter and rough weather more more prithee more it will make you melancholy monsieur jaques thank it more prithee more can suck melancholy out of a song as a weasel sucks eggs more prithee more my voice is ragged know cannot please you do not desire you to please me do desire you to sing come more another stanzo call you 'em stanzos what you will monsieur jaques nay care not for their names they owe me nothing will you sing more at your request than to please myself well then if ever thank any man i'll thank you but that they call compliment is like th encounter of two dogapes and when a man thanks me heartily methinks have given him a penny and he renders me the beggarly thanks come sing and you that will not hold your tongues well i'll end the song sirs cover the while the duke will drink under this tree he hath been all this day to look you and have been all this day to avoid him he is to disputable for my company think of as many matters as he but give heaven thanks and make no boast of them come warble come all together here who doth ambition shun and loves to live i th sun seeking the food he eats and pleas'd with what he gets come hither come hither come hither here shall he see no enemy but winter and rough weather i'll give you a verse to this note that made yesterday in despite of my invention and i'll sing it thus it goes if it do come to pass that any man turn ass leaving his wealth and ease stubborn will to please ducdame ducdame ducdame here shall he see gross fools as he an if he will come to me what's that 'ducdame 'tis a greek invocation to call fools into a circle i'll go sleep if can if cannot i'll rail against all the firstborn of egypt and i'll go seek the duke his banquet is prepar'd exeunt severally the forest enter and dear master can go no further die for food here lie down and measure out my grave farewell kind master why how now adam no greater heart in thee live a little comfort a little cheer thyself a little if this uncouth forest yield anything savage will either be food for it or bring it for food to thee thy conceit is nearer death than thy powers for my sake be comfortable hold death awhile at the arm's end will here be with the presently and if bring thee not something to eat will give thee leave to die but if thou diest before come thou art a mocker of my labour well said thou look'st cheerly and i'll be with thee quickly yet thou liest in the bleak air come will bear thee to some shelter and thou shalt not die for lack of a dinner if there live anything in this desert cheerly good adam exeunt the forest table set out enter and like outlaws think he be transform'd into a beast for can nowhere find him like a man my lord he is but even now gone hence here was he merry hearing of a song if he compact of jars grow musical we shall have shortly discord in the spheres go seek him tell him would speak with him enter he saves my labour by his own approach why how now monsieur what a life is this that your poor friends must woo your company what you look merrily fool a fool met a fool i th forest motley fool miserable world as do live by food met a fool who laid him down and bask'd him in the sun and rail'd on lady fortune in good terms in good set terms and yet a motley fool 'good morrow fool quoth 'no sir quoth he 'call me not fool till heaven hath sent me fortune and then he drew a dial from his poke and looking on it with lacklustre eye says very wisely 'it is ten o'clock thus we may see quoth he 'how the world wags 'tis but an hour ago since it was nine and after one hour more 'twill be eleven and so from hour to hour we ripe and ripe and then from hour to hour we rot and rot and thereby hangs a tale when did hear the motley fool thus moral on the time my lungs began to crow like chanticleer that fools should be so deep contemplative and did laugh sans intermission an hour by his dial noble fool worthy fool motley's the only wear what fool is this worthy fool one that hath been a courtier and says if ladies be but young and fair they have the gift to know it and in his brain which is as dry as the remainder biscuit after a voyage he hath strange places cramm'd with observation the which he vents in mangled forms that were a fool am ambitious for a motley coat thou shalt have one it is my only suit provided that you weed your better judgments of all opinion that grows rank in them that am wise must have liberty withal as large a charter as the wind to blow on whom please for so fools have and they that are most galled with my folly they most must laugh and why sir must they so the why is plain as way to parish church he that a fool doth very wisely hit doth very foolishly although he smart not to seem senseless of the bob if not the wise man's folly is anatomiz'd even by the squand'ring glances of the fool invest me in my motley give me leave to speak my mind and will through and through cleanse the foul body of th infected world if they will patiently receive my medicine fie on thee can tell what thou wouldst do what for a counter would do but good most mischievous foul sin in chiding sin for thou thyself hast been a libertine as sensual as the brutish sting itself and all th embossed sores and headed evils that thou with license of free foot hast caught wouldst thou disgorge into the general world why who cries out on pride that can therein tax any private party doth it not flow as hugely as the sea till that the wearer's very means do ebb what woman in the city do name when that say the citywoman bears the cost of princes on unworthy shoulders who can come in and say that mean her when such a one as she such is her neighbour or what is he of basest function that says his bravery is not on my cost thinking that mean him but therein suits his folly to the mettle of my speech there then how then what then let me see wherein my tongue hath wrong'd him if it do him right then he hath wrong'd himself if he be free why then my taxing like a wildgoose flies unclaim'd of any man but who comes here enter with his sword drawn forbear and eat no more why have eat none yet nor shalt not till necessity be serv'd of what kind should this cock come of art thou thus bolden'd man by thy distress or else a rude despiser of good manners that in civility thou seem'st so empty you touch'd my vein at first the thorny point of bare distress hath ta'en from me the show of smooth civility yet arn inland bred and know some nurture but forbear say he dies that touches any of this fruit till and my affairs are answered an you will not be answer'd with reason must die what would you have your gentleness shall force more than your force move us to gentleness almost die for food and let me have it sit down and feed and welcome to our table speak you so gently pardon me pray you thought that all things had been savage here and therefore put on the countenance of stern commandment but whate'er you are that in this desert inaccessible under the shade of melancholy boughs lose and neglect the creeping hours of time if ever you have look'd on better days if ever been where bells have knoll'd to church if ever sat at any good man's feast if ever from your eyelids wip'd a tear and know what 'tis to pity and be pitied let gentleness my strong enforcement be in the which hope blush and hide my sword true is it that we have seen better days and have with holy bell been knoll'd to church and sat at good men's feasts and wip'd our eyes of drops that sacred pity hath engend'red and therefore sit you down in gentleness and take upon command what help we have that to your wanting may be minist'red then but forbear your food a little while whiles like a doe go to find my fawn and give it food there is an old poor man who after me hath many a weary step limp'd in pure love till he be first suffic'd oppress'd with two weak evils age and hunger will not touch a bit go find him out and we will nothing waste till you return thank ye and be blest for your good comfort exit thou seest we are not all alone unhappy this wide and universal theatre presents more woeful pageants than the scene wherein we play in all the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players they have their exits and their entrances and one man in his time plays many parts his acts being seven ages at first the infant mewling and puking in the nurse's arms then the whining schoolboy with his satchel and shining morning face creeping like snail unwillingly to school and then the lover sighing like furnace with a woeful ballad made to his mistress eyebrow then a soldier full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard jealous in honour sudden and quick in quarrel seeking the bubble reputation even in the cannon's mouth and then the justice in fair round belly with good capon lin'd with eyes severe and beard of formal cut full of wise saws and modern instances and so he plays his part the sixth age shifts into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon with spectacles on nose and pouch on side his youthful hose well sav'd a world too wide for his shrunk shank and his big manly voice turning again toward childish treble pipes and whistles in his sound last scene of all that ends this strange eventful history is second childishness and mere oblivion sans teeth sans eyes sans taste sans every thing reenter with welcome set down your venerable burden and let him feed thank you most for him so had you need scarce can speak to thank you for myself welcome fall to will not trouble you as yet to question you about your fortunes give us some music and good cousin sing blow blow thou winter wind thou art not so unkind as man's ingratitude thy tooth is not so keen because thou art not seen although thy breath be rude heighho sing heighho unto the green holly most friendship is feigning most loving mere folly then heighho the holly this life is most jolly freeze freeze thou bitter sky that dost not bite so nigh as benefits forgot though thou the waters warp thy sting is not so sharp as friend rememb'red not heighho sing c if that you were the good sir rowland's son as you have whisper'd faithfully you were and as mine eye doth his effigies witness most truly limn'd and living in your face be truly welcome hither am the duke that lov'd your father the residue of your fortune go to my cave and tell me good old man thou art right welcome as thy master is support him by the arm give me your hand and let me all your fortunes understand exeunt the palace enter and not see him since sir sir that cannot be but were not the better part made mercy should not seek an absent argument of my revenge thou present but look to it find out thy brother wheresoe'er he is seek him with candle bring him dead or living within this twelvemonth or turn thou no more to seek a living in our territory thy lands and all things that thou dost call thine worth seizure do we seize into our hands till thou canst quit thee by thy brother's mouth of what we think against thee that your highness knew my heart in this never lov'd my brother in my life more villain thou well push him out of doors and let my officers of such a nature make an extent upon his house and lands do this expediently and turn him going exeunt the forest enter with a paper hang there my verse in witness of my love and thou thricecrowned queen of night survey with thy chaste eye from thy pale sphere above thy huntress name that my full life doth sway rosalind these trees shall be my books and in their barks my thoughts i'll character that every eye which in this forest looks shall see thy virtue witness'd every where run run orlando carve on every tree the fair the chaste and unexpressive she exit enter and and how like you this shepherd's life master touchstone truly shepherd in respect of itself it is a good life but in respect that it is a shepherd's life it is nought in respect that it is solitary like it very well but in respect that it is private it is a very vile life now in respect it is in the fields it pleaseth me well but in respect it is not in the court it is tedious as it is a spare life look you it fits my humour well but as there is no more plenty in it it goes much against my stomach hast any philosophy in thee shepherd no more but that know the more one sickens the worse at ease he is and that he that wants money means and content is without three good friends that the property of rain is to wet and fire to burn that good pasture makes fat sheep and that a great cause of the night is lack of the sun that he that hath learned no wit by nature nor art may complain of good breeding or comes of a very dull kindred such a one is a natural philosopher wast ever in court shepherd no truly then thou art damn'd nay hope truly thou art damn'd like an illroasted egg all on one side for not being at court your reason why if thou never wast at court thou never saw'st good manners if thou never saw'st good manners then thy manners must be wicked and wickedness is sin and sin is damnation thou art in a parlous state shepherd not a whit touchstone those that are good manners at the court are as ridiculous in the country as the behaviour of the country is most mockable at the court you told me you salute not at the court but you kiss your hands that courtesy would be uncleanly if courtiers were shepherds instance briefly come instance why we are still handling our ewes and their fells you know are greasy why do not your courtier's hands sweat and is not the grease of a mutton as wholesome as the sweat of a man shallow shallow better instance say come besides our hands are hard your lips will feel them the sooner shallow again more sounder instance come and they are often tarr'd over with the surgery of our sheep and would you have us kiss tar the courtier's hands are perfum'd with civet most shallow man thou worm's meat in respect of a good piece of flesh indeed learn of the wise and perpend civet is of a baser birth than tar the very uncleanly flux of a cat mend the instance shepherd you have too courtly a wit for me i'll rest wilt thou rest damn'd god help thee shallow man god make incision in thee thou art raw sir am a true labourer earn that eat get that wear owe no man hate envy no man's happiness glad of other men's good content with my harm and the greatest of my pride is to see my ewes graze and my lambs suck that is another simple sin in you to bring the ewes and the rams together and to offer to get your living by the copulation of cattle to be bawd to a bellwether and to betray a shelamb of a twelvemonth to crookedpated old cuckoldly ram out of all reasonable match if thou beest not damn'd for this the devil himself will have no shepherds cannot see else how thou shouldst scape here comes young master ganymede my new mistress's brother enter reading a paper 'from the east to western inde no jewel is like rosalinde her worth being mounted on the wind through all the world bears rosalinde all the pictures fairest lin'd are but black to rosalinde let no face be kept in mind but the fair of rosalinde i'll rhyme you so eight years together dinners and suppers and sleeping hours excepted it is the right butterwomen's rank to market out fool for a taste if a hart do lack a hind let him seek out rosalinde if the cat will after kind so be sure will rosalinde winter garments must be lin'd so must slender rosalinde they that reap must sheaf and bind then to cart with rosalinde sweetest nut hath sourest rind such a nut is rosalinde he that sweetest rose will find must find love's prick and rosalinde this is the very false gallop of verses why do you infect yourself with them peace you dull fool found them on a tree truly the tree yields bad fruit i'll graff it with you and then shall graff it with a medlar then it will be the earliest fruit i th country for you'll be rotten ere you be half ripe and that's the right virtue of the medlar you have said but whether wisely or no let the forest judge enter with a writing peace here comes my sister reading stand aside 'why should this a desert be for it is unpeopled no tongues i'll hang on every tree that shall civil sayings show some how brief the life of man runs his erring pilgrimage that the streching of a span buckles in his sum of age some of violated vows 'twixt the souls of friend and friend but upon the fairest boughs or at every sentence end will rosalinda write teaching all that read to know the quintessence of every sprite heaven would in little show therefore heaven nature charg'd that one body should be fill'd with all graces wideenlarg'd nature presently distill'd helen's cheek but not her heart cleopatra's majesty atalanta's better part sad lucretia's modesty thus rosalinde of many parts by heavenly synod was devis'd of many faces eyes and hearts to have the touches dearest priz'd heaven would that she these gifts should have and to live and die her slave most gentle pulpiter what tedious homily of love have you wearied your parishioners withal and never cried 'have patience good people how now back friends shepherd go off a little go with him sirrah come shepherd let us make an honourable retreat though not with bag and baggage yet with scrip and scrippage exeunt and didst thou hear these verses yes heard them all and more too for some of them had in them more feet than the verses would bear that's no matter the feet might bear the verses ay but the feet were lame and could not bear themselves without the verse and therefore stood lamely in the verse but didst thou hear without wondering how thy name should be hang'd and carved upon these trees was seven of the nine days out of the wonder before you came for look here what found on a palmtree was never so berhym'd since pythagoras time that was an irish rat which can hardly remember trow you who hath done this is it a man and a chain that you once wore about his neck change you colour prithee who lord lord it is a hard matter for friends to meet but mountains may be remov'd with earthquakes and so encounter nay but who is it is it possible nay prithee now with most petitionary vehemence tell me who it is wonderful wonderful most wonderful wonderful and yet again wonderful and after that out of all whooping good my complexion dost thou think though am caparison'd like a man have a doublet and hose in my disposition one inch of delay more is a south sea of discovery prithee tell me who is it quickly and speak apace would thou could'st stammer that thou mightst pour this conceal'd man out of thy mouth as wine comes out of narrowmouth'd bottle either too much at once or none at all prithee take the cork out of thy mouth that may drink thy tidings so you may put a man in your belly is he of god's making what manner of man is his head worth a hat or his chin worth a beard nay he hath but a little beard why god will send more if the man will be thankful let me stay the growth of his beard if thou delay me not the knowledge of his chin it is young orlando that tripp'd up the wrestler's heels and your heart both in an instant nay but the devil take mocking speak sad brow and true maid faith coz 'tis he orlando orlando alas the day what shall do with my doublet and hose what did he when thou saw'st him what said he how look'd he wherein went he what makes he here did he ask for me where remains he how parted he with thee and when shalt thou see him again answer me in one word you must borrow me gargantua's mouth first 'tis a word too great for any mouth of this age's size to say ay and no to these particulars is more than to answer in a catechism but doth he know that am in this forest and in man's apparel looks he as freshly as he did the day he wrestled it is as easy to count atomies as to resolve the propositions of a lover but take a taste of my finding him and relish it with good observance found him under a tree like a dropp'd acorn it may well be call'd jove's tree when it drops forth such fruit give me audience good madam proceed there lay he stretch'd along like a wounded knight though it be pity to see such a sight it well becomes the ground cry 'holla to thy tongue prithee it curvets unseasonably he was furnish'd like a hunter ominous he comes to kill my heart would sing my song without a burden thou bring'st me out of tune do you not know am a woman when think must speak sweet say on you bring me out soft comes he not here enter and 'tis he slink by and note him thank you for your company but good faith had as lief have been myself alone and so had but yet for fashion sake thank you too for your society god buy you let's meet as little as we can do desire we may be better strangers pray you mar no more trees with writing love songs in their barks pray you mar no more of my verses with reading them illfavouredly rosalind is your love's name yes just do not like her name there was no thought of pleasing you when she was christen'd what stature is she of just as high as my heart you are full of pretty answers have you not been acquainted with goldsmiths wives and conn'd them out of rings not so but answer you right painted cloth from whence you have studied your questions you have a nimble wit think 'twas made of atalanta's heels will you sit down with me and we two will rail against our mistress the world and all our misery will chide no breather in the world but myself against whom know most faults the worst fault you have is to be in love 'tis a fault will not change for your best virtue am weary of you by my troth was seeking for a fool when found you he is drown'd in the brook look but in and you shall see him there shall see mine own figure which take to be either a fool or a cipher i'll tarry no longer with you farewell good signior love am glad of your departure adieu good monsieur melancholy exit aside to will speak to him like a saucy lackey and under that habit play the knave with him do you hear forester very well what would you pray you what is't o'clock you should ask me what time o day there's no clock in the forest then there is no true lover in the forest else sighing every minute and groaning every hour would detect the lazy foot of time as well as a clock and why not the swift foot of time had not that been as proper by no means sir time travels in divers paces with divers persons i'll tell you who time ambles withal who time trots withal who time gallops withal and who he stands still withal prithee who doth he trot withal marry he trots hard with a young maid between the contract of her marriage and the day it is solemniz'd if the interim be but a se'nnight time's pace is so hard that it seems the length of seven year who ambles time withal with a priest that lacks latin and a rich man that hath not the gout for the one sleeps easily because he cannot study and the other lives merrily because he feels no pain the one lacking the burden of lean and wasteful learning the other knowing no burden of heavy tedious penury these time ambles withal who doth he gallop withal with a thief to the gallows for though he go as softly as foot can fall he thinks himself too soon there who stays it still withal with lawyers in the vacation for they sleep between term and term and then they perceive not how time moves where dwell you pretty youth with this shepherdess my sister here in the skirts of the forest like fringe upon a petticoat are you native of this place as the coney that you see dwell where she is kindled your accent is something finer than you could purchase in so removed a dwelling have been told so of many but indeed an old religious uncle of mine taught me to speak who was in his youth an inland man one that knew courtship too well for there he fell in love have heard him read many lectures against it and thank god am not a woman to be touch'd with so many giddy offences as he hath generally tax'd their whole sex withal can you remember any of the principal evils that he laid to the charge of women there were none principal they were all like one another as halfpence are every one fault seeming monstrous till his fellowfault came to match it prithee recount some of them no will not cast away my physic but on those that are sick there is a man haunts the forest that abuses our young plants with carving 'rosalind on their barks hangs odes upon hawthorns and elegies on brambles all forsooth deifying the name of rosalind if could meet that fancymonger would give him some good counsel for he seems to have the quotidian of love upon him am he that is so loveshak'd pray you tell me your remedy there is none of my uncle's marks upon you he taught me how to know a man in love in which cage of rushes am sure you are not prisoner what were his marks lean cheek which you have not a blue eye and sunken which you have not an unquestionable spirit which you have not a beard neglected which you have not but pardon you for that for simply your having in beard is a younger brother's revenue then your hose should be ungarter'd your bonnet unbanded your sleeve unbutton'd your shoe untied and every thing about you demonstrating a careless desolation but you are no such man you are rather pointdevice in your accoutrements as loving yourself than seeming the lover of any other fair youth would could make thee believe love me believe it you may as soon make her that you love believe it which warrant she is apter to do than to confess she does that is one of the points in the which women still give the lie to their consciences but in good sooth are you he that hangs the verses on the trees wherein rosalind is so admired swear to thee youth by the white hand of rosalind am that he that unfortunate he but are you so much in love as your rhymes speak neither rhyme nor reason can express how much love is merely a madness and tell you deserves as well a dark house and a whip as madmen do and the reason why they are not so punish'd and cured is that the lunacy is so ordinary that the whippers are in love too yet profess curing it by counsel did you ever cure any so yes one and in this manner he was to imagine me his love his mistress and set him every day to woo me at which time would being but a moonish youth grieve be effeminate changeable longing and liking proud fantastical apish shallow inconstant full of tears full of smiles for every passion something and for no passion truly anything as boys and women are for the most part cattle of this colour would now like him now loathe him then entertain him then forswear him now weep for him then spit at him that drave my suitor from his mad humour of love to a living humour of madness which was to forswear the full stream of the world and to live in a nook merely monastic and thus cur'd him and this way will take upon me to wash your liver as clean as a sound sheep's heart that there shall not be one spot of love in 't would not be cured youth would cure you if you would but call me rosalind and come every day to my cote and woo me now by the faith of my love will tell me where it is go with me to it and i'll show it you and by the way you shall tell me where in the forest you live will you go with all my heart good youth nay you must call me rosalind come sister will you go exeunt the forest enter and behind come apace good audrey will fetch up your goats audrey and how audrey am the man yet doth my simple feature content you your features lord warrant us what features am here with thee and thy goats as the most capricious poet honest ovid was among the goths aside knowledge illinhabited worse than jove in a thatch'd house when a man's verses cannot be understood nor a man's good wit seconded with the forward child understanding it strikes a man more dead than a great reckoning in a little room truly would the gods had made thee poetical do not know what 'poetical is is it honest in deed and word is it a true thing no truly for the truest poetry is the most feigning and lovers are given to poetry and what they swear in poetry may be said as lovers they do feign do you wish then that the gods had made me poetical do truly for thou swear'st to me thou art honest now if thou wert a poet might have some hope thou didst feign would you not have me honest no truly unless thou wert hardfavour'd for honesty coupled to beauty is to have honey a sauce to sugar aside material fool well am not fair and therefore pray the gods make me honest truly and to cast away honesty upon a foul slut were to put good meat into an unclean dish am not a slut though thank the gods am foul well praised be the gods for thy foulness sluttishness may come hereafter but be it as it may be will marry thee and to that end have been with sir oliver martext the vicar of the next village who hath promis'd to meet me in this place of the forest and to couple us aside would fain see this meeting well the gods give us joy amen man may if he were of a fearful heart stagger in this attempt for here we have no temple but the wood no assembly but hornbeasts but what though courage as horns are odious they are necessary it is said 'many a man knows no end of his goods right many a man has good horns and knows no end of them well that is the dowry of his wife 'tis none of his own getting horns even so poor men alone no no the noblest deer hath them as huge as the rascal is the single man therefore blessed no as a wall'd town is more worthier than a village so is the forehead of a married man more honourable than the bare brow of a bachelor and by how much defence is better than no skill by so much is horn more precious than to want here comes sir oliver enter sir oliver martext you are well met will you dispatch us here under this tree or shall we go with you to your chapel is there none here to give the woman will not take her on gift of any man truly she must be given or the marriage is not lawful discovering himself proceed proceed i'll give her good even good master whatyecall't how do you sir you are very well met goddild you for your last company am very glad to see you even a toy in hand here sir nay pray be cover'd will you be married motley as the ox hath his bow sir the horse his curb and the falcon her bells so man hath his desires and as pigeons bill so wedlock would be nibbling and will you being a man of your breeding be married under a bush like a beggar get you to church and have a good priest that can tell you what marriage is this fellow will but join you together as they join wainscot then one of you will prove a shrunk panel and like green timber warp warp aside am not in the mind but were better to be married of him than of another for he is not like to marry me well and not being well married it will be a good excuse for me hereafter to leave my wife go thou with me and let me counsel thee come sweet audrey we must be married or we must live in bawdry farewell good master oliver not sweet oliver brave oliver leave me not behind thee but wind away begone say will not to wedding with thee exeunt and 'tis no matter ne'er a fantastical knave of them all shall flout me out of my calling exit the forest enter and never talk to me will weep do prithee but yet have the grace to consider that tears do not become a man but have not cause to weep as good cause as one would desire therefore weep his very hair is of the dissembling colour something browner than judas's marry his kisses are judas's own children faith his hair is of a good colour an excellent colour your chestnut was ever the only colour and his kissing is as full of sanctity as the touch of holy bread he hath bought a pair of cast lips of diana nun of winter's sisterhood kisses not more religiously the very ice of chastity is in them but why did he swear he would come this morning and comes not nay certainly there is no truth in him do you think so yes think he is not a pickpurse nor a horsestealer but for his verity in love do think him as concave as covered goblet or a wormeaten nut not true in love yes when he is in but think he is not in you have heard him swear downright he was 'was is not 'is besides the oath of a lover is no stronger than the word of a tapster they are both the confirmer of false reckonings he attends here in the forest on the duke your father met the duke yesterday and had much question with him he asked me of what parentage was told him of as good as he so he laugh'd and let me go but what talk we of fathers when there is such a man as orlando that's a brave man he writes brave verses speaks brave words swears brave oaths and breaks them bravely quite traverse athwart the heart of his lover as a puny tilter that spurs his horse but on one side breaks his staff like a noble goose but all's brave that youth mounts and folly guides who comes here enter mistress and master you have oft enquired after the shepherd that complain'd of love who you saw sitting by me on the turf praising the proud disdainful shepherdess that was his mistress well and what of him if you will see a pageant truly play'd between the pale complexion of true love and the red glow of scorn and proud disdain go hence a little and shall conduct you if you will mark it come let us remove the sight of lovers feedeth those in love bring us to this sight and you shall say i'll prove a busy actor in their play exeunt another part of the forest enter and sweet phebe do not scorn me do not phebe say that you love me not but say not so in bitterness the common executioner whose heart th accustom'd sight of death makes hard falls not the axe upon the humbled neck but first begs pardon will you sterner be than he that dies and lives by bloody drops enter and at a distance would not be thy executioner fly thee for would not injure thee thou tell'st me there is murder in mine eye 'tis pretty sure and very probable that eyes that are the frail'st and softest things who shut their coward gates on atomies should be call'd tyrants butchers murderers now do frown on thee with all my heart and if mine eyes can wound now let them kill thee now counterfeit to swoon why now fall down or if thou canst not for shame for shame lie not to say mine eyes are murderers now show the wound mine eye hath made in thee scratch thee but with a pin and there remains some scar of it lean upon a rush the cicatrice and capable impressure thy palm some moment keeps but now mine eyes which have darted at thee hurt thee not nor am sure there is not force in eyes that can do hurt dear phebe if ever as that ever may be near you meet in some fresh cheek the power of fancy then shall you know the wounds invisible that love's keen arrows make but till that time come not thou near me and when that time comes afflict me with thy mocks pity me not as till that time shall not pity thee advancing and why pray you who might be your mother that you insult exult and all at once over the wretched what though you have no beauty as by my faith see no more in you than without candle may go dark to bed must you be therefore proud and pitiless why what means this why do you look on me see no more in you than in the ordinary of nature's salework 'od's my little life think she means to tangle my eyes too no faith proud mistress hope not after it 'tis not your inky brows your black silk hair your bugle eyeballs nor your cheek of cream that can entame my spirits to your worship you foolish shepherd wherefore do you follow her like foggy south puffing with wind and rain you are a thousand times a properer man than she a woman 'tis such fools as you that makes the world full of illfavour'd children 'tis not her glass but you that flatters her and out of you she sees herself more proper than any of her lineaments can show her but mistress know yourself down on your knees and thank heaven fasting for a good man's love for must tell you friendly in your ear sell when you can you are not for all markets cry the man mercy love him take his offer foul is most foul being foul to be a scoffer so take her to thee shepherd fare you well sweet youth pray you chide a year together had rather hear you chide than this man woo he's fall'n in love with your foulness and she'll fall in love with my anger if it be so as fast as she answers thee with frowning looks i'll sauce her with bitter words why look you so upon me for no ill will bear you pray you do not fall in love with me for am falser than vows made in wine besides like you not if you will know my house 'tis at the tuft of olives here hard by will you go sister shepherd ply her hard come sister shepherdess look on him better and be not proud though all the world could see none could be so abus'd in sight as he come to our flock exeunt and dead shepherd now find thy saw of might 'who ever lov'd that lov'd not at first sight sweet phebe ha what say'st thou silvius sweet phebe pity me why arn sorry for thee gentle silvius wherever sorrow is relief would be if you do sorrow at my grief in love by giving love your sorrow and my grief were both extermin'd thou hast my love is not that neighbourly would have you why that were covetousness silvius the time was that hated thee and yet it is not that bear thee love but since that thou canst talk of love so well thy company which erst was irksome to me will endure and i'll employ thee too but do not look for further recompense than thine own gladness that thou art employ'd so holy and so perfect is my love and in such a poverty of grace that shall think it a most plenteous crop to glean the broken ears after the man that the main harvest reaps loose now and then scatt'red smile and that i'll live upon know'st thou the youth that spoke to me erewhile not very well but have met him oft and he hath bought the cottage and the bounds that the old carlot once was master of think not love him though ask for him 'tis but a peevish boy yet he talks well but what care for words yet words do well when he that speaks them pleases those that hear it is a pretty youth not very pretty but sure he's proud and yet his pride becomes him he'll make a proper man the best thing in him is his complexion and faster than his tongue did make offence his eye did heal it up he is not very tall yet for his years he's tall his leg is but soso and yet 'tis well there was a pretty redness in his lip little riper and more lusty red than that mix'd in his cheek 'twas just the difference betwixt the constant red and mingled damask there be some women silvius had they mark'd him in parcels as did would have gone near to fall in love with him but for my part love him not nor hate him not and yet have more cause to hate him than to love him for what had he to do to chide at me he said mine eyes were black and my hair black and now am rememb'red scorn'd at me marvel why answer'd not again but that's all one omittance is no quittance i'll write to him a very taunting letter and thou shalt bear it wilt thou silvius phebe with all my heart i'll write it straight the matter's in my head and in my heart will be bitter with him and passing short go with me silvius exeunt the forest enter and prithee pretty youth let me be better acquainted with thee they say you are a melancholy fellow am so do love it better than laughing those that are in extremity of either are abominable fellows and betray themselves to every modern censure worse than drunkards why 'tis good to be sad and say nothing why then 'tis good to be a post have neither the scholar's melancholy which is emulation nor the musician's which is fantastical nor the courtier's which is proud nor the soldier's which is ambitious nor the lawyer's which is politic nor the lady's which is nice nor the lover's which is all these but it is a melancholy of mine own compounded of many simples extracted from many objects and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness traveller by my faith you have great reason to be sad fear you have sold your own lands to see other men's then to have seen much and to have nothing is to have rich eyes and poor hands yes have gain'd my experience enter and your experience makes you sad had rather have a fool to make me merry than experience to make me sad and to travel for it too good day and happiness dear rosalind nay then god buy you an you talk in blank verse farewell monsieur traveller look you lisp and wear strange suits disable all the benefits of your own country be out of love with your nativity and almost chide god for making you that countenance you are or will scarce think you have swam in a gondola exit why how now orlando where have you been all this while you a lover an you serve me such another trick never come in my sight more my fair rosalind come within an hour of my promise break an hour's promise in love he that will divide a minute into a thousand parts and break but a part of the thousand part of a minute in the affairs of love it may be said of him that cupid hath clapp'd him o th shoulder but i'll warrant him heartwhole pardon me dear rosalind nay an you be so tardy come no more in my sight had as lief be woo'd of a snail of a snail ay of a snail for though he comes slowly he carries his house on his head a better jointure think than you make a woman besides he brings his destiny with him what's that why horns which such as you are fain to be beholding to your wives for but he comes armed in his fortune and prevents the slander of his wife virtue is no hornmaker and my rosalind is virtuous and am your rosalind it pleases him to call you so but he hath a rosalind of a better leer than you come woo me woo me for now am in a holiday humour and like enough to consent what would you say to me now an were your very very rosalind would kiss before spoke nay you were better speak first and when you were gravell'd for lack of matter you might take occasion to kiss very good orators when they are out they will spit and for lovers lacking god warn us matter the cleanliest shift is to kiss how if the kiss be denied then she puts you to entreaty and there begins new matter who could be out being before his beloved mistress marry that should you if were your mistress or should think my honesty ranker than my wit what of my suit not out of your apparel and yet out of your suit am not your rosalind take some joy to say you are because would be talking of her well in her person say will not have you then in mine own person die no faith die by attorney the poor world is almost six thousand years old and in all this time there was not any man died in his own person videlicet in a lovecause troilus had his brains dash'd out with a grecian club yet he did what he could to die before and he is one of the patterns of love leander he would have liv'd many a fair year though hero had turn'd nun if it had not been for a hot midsummer night for good youth he went but forth to wash him in the hellespont and being taken with the cramp was drown'd and the foolish chroniclers of that age found it was hero of sestos but these are all lies men have died from time to time and worms have eaten them but not for love would not have my right rosalind of this mind for protest her frown might kill me by this hand it will not kill a fly but come now will be your rosalind in a more comingon disposition and ask me what you will will grant it then love me rosalind yes faith will fridays and saturdays and all and wilt thou have me ay and twenty such what sayest thou are you not good hope so why then can one desire too much of a good thing come sister you shall be the priest and marry us give me your hand orlando what do you say sister pray thee marry us cannot say the words you must begin 'will you orlando go to will you orlando have to wife this rosalind will ay but when why now as fast as she can marry us then you must say take thee rosalind for wife take thee rosalind for wife might ask you for your commission but do take thee orlando for my husband there's a girl goes before the priest and certainly a woman's thought runs before her actions so do all thoughts they are wing'd now tell me how long you would have her after you have possess'd her for ever and a day say 'a day without the 'ever no no orlando men are april when they woo december when they wed maids are may when they are maids but the sky changes when they are wives will be more jealous of thee than a barbary cockpigeon over his hen more clamorous than a parrot against rain more newfangled than an ape more giddy in my desires than a monkey will weep for nothing like diana in the fountain and will do that when you are dispos'd to be merry will laugh like a hyen and that when thou are inclin'd to sleep but will my rosalind do so by my life she will do as do but she is wise or else she could not have the wit to do this the wiser the waywarder make the doors upon a woman's wit and it will out at the casement shut that and 'twill out at the keyhole stop that 'twill fly with the smoke out at the chimney man that had a wife with such a wit he might say 'wit whither wilt nay you might keep that check for it till you met your wife's wit going to your neighbour's bed and what wit could wit have to excuse that marry to say she came to seek you there you shall never take her without her answer unless you take her without her tongue that woman that cannot make her fault her husband's occasion let her never nurse her child herself for she will breed it like a fool for these two hours rosalind will leave thee alas dear love cannot lack thee two hours must attend the duke at dinner by two o'clock will be with thee again ay go your ways go your ways knew what you would prove my friends told me as much and thought no less that flattering tongue of yours won me 'tis but one cast away and so come death two o'clock is your hour ay sweet rosalind by my troth and in good earnest and so god mend me and by all pretty oaths that are not dangerous if you break one jot of your promise or come one minute behind your hour will think you the most pathetical breakpromise and the most hollow lover and the most unworthy of her you call rosalind that may be chosen out of the gross band of the unfaithful therefore beware my censure and keep your promise with no less religion than if thou wert indeed my rosalind so adieu well time is the old justice that examines all such offenders and let time try adieu exit you have simply misus'd our sex in your loveprate we must have your doublet and hose pluck'd over your head and show the world what the bird hath done to her own nest coz coz coz my pretty little coz that thou didst know how many fathom deep am in love but it cannot be sounded my affection hath an unknown bottom like the bay of portugal or rather bottomless that as fast as you pour affection in it runs out no that same wicked bastard of venus that was begot of thought conceiv'd of spleen and born of madness that blind rascally boy that abuses every one's eyes because his own are out let him be judge how deep am in love i'll tell thee aliena cannot be out of the sight of orlando i'll go find a shadow and sigh till he come and i'll sleep exeunt the forest enter and in the habit of foresters which is he that killed the deer sir it was let's present him to the duke like a roman conqueror and it would do well to set the deer's horns upon his head for a branch of victory have you no song forester for this purpose yes sir sing it 'tis no matter how it be in tune so it make noise enough what shall he have that kill'd the deer his leather skin and horns to wear the rest shall hear this burden then sing him home take thou no scorn to wear the horn it was a crest ere thou wast born thy father's father wore it and thy father bore it the horn the horn the lusty horn is not a thing to laugh to scorn exeunt the forest enter and how say you now is it not past two o'clock and here much orlando warrant you with pure love and troubled brain he hath ta'en his bow and arrows and is gone forth to sleep look who comes here enter my errand is to you fair youth my gentle phebe did bid me give you this know not the contents but as guess by the stern brow and waspish action which she did use as she was writing of it it bears an angry tenour pardon me am but as a guiltless messenger patience herself would startle at this letter and play the swaggerer bear this bear all she says am not fair that lack manners she calls me proud and that she could not love me were man as rare as phoenix 'od's my will her love is not the hare that do hunt why writes she so to me well shepherd well this is a letter of your own device no protest know not the contents phebe did write it come come you are a fool and turn'd into the extremity of love saw her hand she has a leathern hand freestonecolour'd hand verily did think that her old gloves were on but 'twas her hands she has a huswife's hand but that's no matter say she never did invent this letter this is a man's invention and his hand sure it is hers why 'tis a boisterous and a cruel style style for challengers why she defies me like turk to christian women's gentle brain could not drop forth such giantrude invention such ethiope words blacker in their effect than in their countenance will you hear the letter so please you for never heard it yet yet heard too much of phebe's cruelty she phebes me mark how the tyrant writes reads 'art thou god to shepherd turn'd that a maiden's heart hath burn'd can a woman rail thus call you this railing 'why thy godhead laid apart warr'st thou with a woman's heart did you ever hear such railing 'whiles the eye of man did woo me that could do no vengeance to me meaning me a beast 'if the scorn of your bright eyne have power to raise such love in mine alack in me what strange effect would they work in mild aspect whiles you chid me did love how then might your prayers move he that brings this love to the little knows this love in me and by him seal up thy mind whether that thy youth and kind will the faithful offer take of me and all that can make or else by him my love deny and then i'll study how to die call you this chiding alas poor shepherd do you pity him no he deserves no pity wilt thou love such a woman what to make thee an instrument and play false strains upon thee not to be endur'd well go your way to her for see love hath made thee tame snake and say this to her that if she love me charge her to love thee if she will not will never have her unless thou entreat for her if you be a true lover hence and not a word for here comes more company exit enter good morrow fair ones pray you if you know where in the purlieus of this forest stands sheepcote fenc'd about with olive trees west of this place down in the neighbour bottom the rank of osiers by the murmuring stream left on your right hand brings you to the place but at this hour the house doth keep itself there's none within if that an eye may profit by a tongue then should know you by description such garments and such years 'the boy is fair of female favour and bestows himself like a ripe sister the woman low and browner than her brother are not you the owner of the house did inquire for it is no boast being ask'd to say we are orlando doth commend him to you both and to that youth he calls his rosalind he sends this bloody napkin are you he am what must we understand by this some of my shame if you will know of me what man am and how and why and where this handkercher was stain'd pray you tell it when last the young orlando parted from you he left a promise to return again within an hour and pacing through the forest chewing the food of sweet and bitter fancy lo what befell he threw his eye aside and mark what object did present itself under an oak whose boughs were moss'd with age and high top bald with dry antiquity wretched ragged man o'ergrown with hair lay sleeping on his back about his neck green and gilded snake had wreath'd itself who with her head nimble in threats approach'd the opening of his mouth but suddenly seeing orlando it unlink'd itself and with indented glides did slip away into a bush under which bush's shade lioness with udders all drawn dry lay couching head on ground with catlike watch when that the sleeping man should stir for 'tis the royal disposition of that beast to prey on nothing that doth seem as dead this seen orlando did approach the man and found it was his brother his elder brother have heard him speak of that same brother and he did render him the most unnatural that liv'd amongst men and well he might so do for well know he was unnatural but to orlando did he leave him there food to the suck'd and hungry lioness twice did he turn his back and purpos'd so but kindness nobler ever than revenge and nature stronger than his just occasion made him give battle to the lioness who quickly fell before him in which hurtling from miserable slumber awak'd are you his brother was't you he rescu'd was't you that did so oft contrive to kill him 'twas but 'tis not do not shame to tell you what was since my conversion so sweetly tastes being the thing am but for the bloody napkin by and by when from the first to last betwixt us two tears our recountments had most kindly bath'd as how came into that desert place in brief he led me to the gentle duke who gave me fresh array and entertainment committing me unto my brother's love who led me instantly unto his cave there stripp'd himself and here upon his arm the lioness had torn some flesh away which all this while had bled and now he fainted and cried in fainting upon rosalind brief recover'd him bound up his wound and after some small space being strong at heart he sent me hither stranger as am to tell this story that you might excuse his broken promise and to give this napkin dy'd in his blood unto the shepherd youth that he in sport doth call his rosalind swoons why how now ganymede sweet ganymede many will swoon when they do look on blood there is more in it cousin ganymede look he recovers would were at home we'll lead you thither pray you will you take him by the arm be of good cheer youth you a man you lack a man's heart do so confess it ah sirrah a body would think this was well counterfeited pray you tell your brother how well counterfeited heighho this was not counterfeit there is too great testimony in your complexion that it was a passion of earnest counterfeit assure you well then take a good heart and counterfeit to be a man so do but i faith should have been a woman by right come you look paler and paler pray you draw homewards good sir go with us that will for must bear answer back how you excuse my brother rosalind shall devise something but pray you commend my counterfeiting to him will you go exeunt the forest enter and we shall find a time audrey patience gentle audrey faith the priest was good enough for all the old gentleman's saying most wicked sir oliver audrey a most vile martext but audrey there is a youth here in the forest lays claim to you ay know who 'tis he hath no interest in me in the world here comes the man you mean enter it is meat and drink to me to see a clown by my troth we that have good wits have much to answer for we shall be flouting we cannot hold good ev'n audrey god ye good ev'n william and good ev'n to you sir good ev'n gentle friend cover thy head cover thy head nay prithee be cover'd how old are you friend five and twenty sir ripe age is thy name william william sir fair name wast born i th forest here ay sir thank god 'thank god good answer art rich faith sir so so 'so so is good very good very excellent good and yet it is not it is but so so art thou wise ay sir have a pretty wit why thou say'st well do now remember a saying 'the fool doth think he is wise but the wise man knows himself to be a fool the heathen philosopher when he had a desire to eat a grape would open his lips when he put it into his mouth meaning thereby that grapes were made to eat and lips to open you do love this maid do sir give me your hand art thou learned no sir then learn this of me to have is to have for it is a figure in rhetoric that drink being pour'd out of cup into a glass by filling the one doth empty the other for all your writers do consent that ipse is he now you are not ipse for am he which he sir he sir that must marry this woman therefore you clown abandon which is in the vulgar leave the society which in the boorish is company of this female which in the common is woman which together is abandon the society of this female or clown thou perishest or to thy better understanding diest or to wit kill thee make thee away translate thy life into death thy liberty into bondage will deal in poison with thee or in bastinado or in steel will bandy with thee in faction will o'errun thee with policy will kill thee a hundred and fifty ways therefore tremble and depart do good william god rest you merry sir exit enter our master and mistress seeks you come away away trip audrey trip audrey attend attend exeunt the forest enter and is't possible that on so little acquaintance you should like her that but seeing you should love her and loving woo and wooing she should grant and will you persever to enjoy her neither call the giddiness of it in question the poverty of her the small acquaintance my sudden wooing nor her sudden consenting but say with me love aliena say with her that she loves me consent with both that we may enjoy each other it shall be to your good for my father's house and all the revenue that was old sir rowland's will estate upon you and here live and die a shepherd you have my consent let your wedding be tomorrow thither will invite the duke and all's contented followers go you and prepare aliena for look you here comes my rosalind enter god save you brother and you fair sister exit my dear orlando how it grieves me to see thee wear thy heart in a scarf it is my arm thought thy heart had been wounded with the claws of a lion wounded it is but with the eyes of a lady did your brother tell you how counterfeited to swoon when he show'd me your handkercher ay and greater wonders than that know where you are nay 'tis true there was never any thing so sudden but the fight of two rams and caesar's thrasonical brag of came saw and overcame for your brother and my sister no sooner met but they look'd no sooner look'd but they lov'd no sooner lov'd but they sigh'd no sooner sigh'd but they ask'd one another the reason no sooner knew the reason but they sought the remedy and in these degrees have they made pair of stairs to marriage which they will climb incontinent or else be incontinent before marriage they are in the very wrath of love and they will together clubs cannot part them they shall be married tomorrow and will bid the duke to the nuptial but how bitter a thing it is to look into happiness through another man's eyes by so much the more shall tomorrow be at the height of heartheaviness by how much shall think my brother happy in having what he wishes for why then tomorrow cannot serve your turn for rosalind can live no longer by thinking will weary you then no longer with idle talking know of me then for now speak to some purpose that know you are a gentleman of good conceit speak not this that you should bear a good opinion of my knowledge insomuch say know you are neither do labour for a greater esteem than may in some little measure draw a belief from you to do yourself good and not to grace me believe then if you please that can do strange things have since was three year old convers'd with a magician most profound in his art and yet not damnable if you do love rosalind so near the heart as your gesture cries it out when your brother marries aliena shall you marry her know into what straits of fortune she is driven and it is not impossible to me if it appear not inconvenient to you to set her before your eyes tomorrow human as she is and without any danger speak'st thou in sober meanings by my life do which tender dearly though say am a magician therefore put you in your best array bid your friends for if you will be married tomorrow you shall and to rosalind if you will enter and look here comes a lover of mine and a lover of hers youth you have done me much ungentleness to show the letter that writ to you care not if have it is my study to seem despiteful and ungentle to you you are there follow'd by a faithful shepherd look upon him love him he worships you good shepherd tell this youth what 'tis to love it is to be all made of sighs and tears and so am for phebe and for ganymede and for rosalind and for no woman it is to be all made of faith and service and so am for phebe and for ganymede and for rosalind and for no woman it is to be all made of fantasy all made of passion and all made of wishes all adoration duty and observance all humbleness all patience and impatience all purity all trial all obedience and so am for phebe and so am for ganymede and so am for rosalind and so am for no woman if this be so why blame you me to love you if this be so why blame you me to love you if this be so why blame you me to love you why do you speak too 'why blame you me to love you to her that is not here nor doth not hear pray you no more of this 'tis like the howling of irish wolves against the moon to will help you if can to would love you if could tomorrow meet me all together to will marry you if ever marry woman and i'll be married tomorrow to will satisfy you if ever satisfied man and you shall be married tomorrow to silvius will content you if what pleases you contents you and you shall be married tomorrow to as you love rosalind meet to as you love phebe meet and as love no woman i'll meet so fare you well have left you commands i'll not fail if live nor nor exeunt the forest enter and tomorrow is the joyful day audre'y tomorrow will we be married do desire it with all my heart and hope it is no dishonest desire to desire to be a woman of the world here come two of the banish'd duke's pages enter two well met honest gentleman by my troth well met come sit sit and a song we are for you sit i th middle shall we clap into't roundly without hawking or spitting or saying we are hoarse which are the only prologues to a bad voice i'faith i'faith and both in a tune like two gipsies on a horse it was a lover and his lass with a hey and a ho and a hey nonino that o'er the green cornfield did pass in the spring time the only pretty ring time when birds do sing hey ding a ding ding sweet lovers love the spring between the acres of the rye with a hey and a ho and a hey nonino these pretty country folks would lie in the spring time c this carol they began that hour with a hey and a ho and a hey nonino how that a life was but a flower in the spring time c and therefore take the present time with a hey and a ho and a hey nonino for love is crowned with the prime in the spring time c truly young gentlemen though there was no great matter in the ditty yet the note was very untuneable are deceiv'd sir we kept time we lost not our time by my troth yes count it but time lost to hear such a foolish song god buy you and god mend your voices come audrey exeunt the forest enter and dost thou believe orlando that the boy can do all this that he hath promised sometimes do believe and sometimes do not as those that fear they hope and know they fear enter and patience once more whiles our compact is urg'd you say if bring in your rosalind you will bestow her on orlando here that would had kingdoms to give with her and you say you will have her when bring her that would were of all kingdoms king you say you'll marry me if be willing that will should die the hour after but if you do refuse to marry me you'll give yourself to this most faithful shepherd so is the bargain you say that you'll have phebe if she will though to have her and death were both one thing have promis'd to make all this matter even keep you your word duke to give your daughter you yours orlando to receive his daughter keep your word phebe that you'll marry me or else refusing me to wed this shepherd keep your word silvius that you'll marry her if she refuse me and from hence go to make these doubts all even exeunt and do remember in this shepherd boy some lively touches of my daughter's favour my lord the first time that ever saw him methought he was a brother to your daughter but my good lord this boy is forestborn and hath been tutor'd in the rudiments of many desperate studies by his uncle whom he reports to be a great magician obscured in the circle of this forest enter and there is sure another flood toward and these couples are coming to the ark here comes a pair of very strange beasts which in all tongues are call'd fools salutation and greeting to you all good my lord bid him welcome this is the motleyminded gentleman that have so often met in the forest he hath been a courtier he swears if any man doubt that let him put me to my purgation have trod a measure have flatt'red a lady have been politic with my friend smooth with mine enemy have undone three tailors have had four quarrels and like to have fought one and how was that ta'en up faith we met and found the quarrel was upon the seventh cause how seventh cause good my lord like this fellow like him very well god 'ild you sir desire you of the like press in here sir amongst the rest of the country copulatives to swear and to forswear according as marriage binds and blood breaks poor virgin sir an illfavour'd thing sir but mine own a poor humour of mine sir to take that that man else will rich honesty dwells like a miser sir in a poor house as your pearl in your foul oyster by my faith he is very swift and sententious according to the fool's bolt sir and such dulcet diseases but for the seventh cause how did you find the quarrel on the seventh cause upon a lie seven times removed bear your body more seeming audrey as thus sir did dislike the cut of a certain courtier's beard he sent me word if said his beard was not cut well he was in the mind it was this is call'd the retort courteous if sent him word again it was not well cut he would send me word he cut it to please himself this is call'd the quip modest if again it was not well cut he disabled my judgment this is call'd the reply churlish if again it was not well cut he would answer spake not true this is call'd the reproof valiant if again it was not well cut he would say lie this is call'd the countercheck quarrelsome and so to the lie circumstantial and the lie direct and how oft did you say his beard was not well cut durst go no further than the lie circumstantial nor he durst not give me the lie direct and so we measur'd swords and parted can you nominate in order now the degrees of the lie sir we quarrel in print by the book as you have books for good manners will name you the degrees the first the retort courteous the second the quip modest the third the reply churlish the fourth the reproof valiant the fifth the countercheck quarrelsome the sixth the lie with circumstance the seventh the lie direct all these you may avoid but the lie direct and you may avoid that too with an if knew when seven justices could not take up a quarrel but when the parties were met themselves one of them thought but of an if as 'if you said so then said so and they shook hands and swore brothers your if is the only peacemaker much virtue in if is not this a rare fellow my lord he's as good at any thing and yet a fool he uses his folly like a stalkinghorse and under the presentation of that he shoots his wit enter and still then is there mirth in heaven when earthly things made even atone together good duke receive thy daughter hymen from heaven brought her yea brought her hither that thou mightst join her hand with his whose heart within his bosom is to to you give myself for am yours to to you give myself for am yours if there be truth in sight you are my daughter if there be truth in sight you are my rosalind if sight and shape be true why then my love adieu i'll have no father if you be not he i'll have no husband if you be not he nor ne'er wed woman if you be not she peace ho bar confusion 'tis must make conclusion of these most strange events here's eight that must take hands to join in hymen's bands if truth holds true contents you and you no cross shall part you and you are heart in heart you to his love must accord or have a woman to your lord you and you are sure together as the winter to foul weather whiles a wedlockhymn we sing feed yourselves with questioning that reason wonder may diminish how thus we met and these things finish wedding is great juno's crown blessed bond of board and bed 'tis hymen peoples every town high wedlock then be honoured honour high honour and renown to hymen god of every town my dear niece welcome thou art to me even daughter welcome in no less degree will not eat my word now thou art mine thy faith my fancy to thee doth combine enter de de let me have audience for a word or two am the second son of old sir rowland that bring these tidings to this fair assembly duke frederick hearing how that every day men of great worth resorted to this forest address'd a mighty power which were on foot in his own conduct purposely to take his brother here and put him to the sword and to the skirts of this wild wood he came where meeting with an old religious man after some question with him was converted both from his enterprise and from the world his crown bequeathing to his banish'd brother and all their lands restor'd to them again that were with him exil'd this to be true do engage my life welcome young man thou offer'st fairly to thy brothers wedding to one his lands withheld and to the other land itself at large a potent dukedom first in this forest let us do those ends that here were well begun and well begot and after every of this happy number that have endur'd shrewd days and nights with us shall share the good of our returned fortune according to the measure of their states meantime forget this newfall'n dignity and fall into our rustic revelry play music and you brides and bridegrooms all with measure heap'd in joy to th measures fall sir by your patience if heard you rightly the duke hath put on a religious life and thrown into neglect the pompous court he hath to him will out of these convertites there is much matter to be heard and learn'd to you to your former honour bequeath your patience and your virtue well deserves it to you to a love that your true faith doth merit to you to your land and love and great allies to you to a long and welldeserved bed to and you to wrangling for thy loving voyage is but for two months victuall'd so to your pleasures am for other than for dancing measures stay jaques stay to see no pastime what you would have i'll stay to know at your abandon'd cave exit proceed proceed we will begin these rites as we do trust they'll end in true delights dance exeunt it is not the fashion to see the lady the epilogue but it is no more unhandsome than to see the lord the prologue if it be true that good wine needs no bush 'tis true that a good play needs no epilogue yet to good wine they do use good bushes and good plays prove the better by the help of good epilogues what a case am in then that am neither a good epilogue nor cannot insinuate with you in the behalf of a good play am not furnish'd like a beggar therefore to beg will not become me my way is to conjure you and i'll begin with the women charge you women for the love you bear to men to like as much of this play as please you and charge you men for the love you bear to women as perceive by your simp'ring none of you hates them that between you and the women the play may please if were a woman would kiss as many of you as had beards that pleas'd me complexions that lik'd me and breaths that defied not and am sure as many as have good beards or good faces or sweet breaths will for my kind offer when make curtsy bid me farewell